Did I forget? Or have I just overcome it? Why did I give him a second chance? If it could be called "a chance"... I should have always kept those miserable feelings he used to give in my mind. Anxiety, upset, sadness...Quite a lot of negative moods while mixed with a little sweet sense... Aren't those to be enough reasons to reject his occasional kindness? Now those disgusting feeling have come back, which I really hate most! While, I have to admit that he does have some weird influence upon me, and always have... But, still, I've realized that holding on one thing that has passed yet will slow down my pace for pursuing a promising future. And maybe, that's exactly why I chose to leave him at that time. There's also one point which I should learn that maybe I don't love him. What makes me think I've been falling love with him is just a mistake. I don't understand him, and so does he. The person I thought I was in love with is not the real one in front of me. He just showed the charming part of his character, and I framed the rest by my own imagination... Ridiculous, huh? But girls always incline to make mistakes like this. so, to summaries, I really need to make a specific decision, totally forget him, and get a new start! Well, still, I hope that he could find his most cherished beloved in the end. I have to say, he's a nice person to some extent, but not the right one for me. Sunny day forever~ :)

Still rainy day...Oh, Gosh! When will it be sunny? I'm really tired of rain!>0< The reasons are as follows 1.These humid rainy days always depress me! When I was 17 or 18, I madly loved rainy days which I regarded as the most romatic days just next to snowy days. The temperature is low, no sweat, no sun, and everything is just comfortable with the wind~ But things have changed yet. In these rainy days I can't help feeling moody. And what's more,it is because it's raining outside, so that I had to be kept in the room without going anywhere that makes me crazy! 2.Damp clothes can't be dry in time! It's apparently that you can't be one-clothes-a-day in these rainy days...For instance, I haven't changed my clothes for 4 days!! Gosh, it's almost approached my limitation yet... All in all, I hate rainy days! Hate! Hate! Hate!!!

I don't know how to handle myself. For instance, often, I made a decision at noon while don't realize it in the afternoon. I used to speak to myself that you should keep on, do all you can do to achieve your goal. Nevertheless, things always don't turn out the way I had expected. Frustrated, right? Something must be wrong with my character - - If I still maintain this situation, then, how can I face my dream? Oh, my gosh! I'm too ashamed yet disappointed with myself! What's more, even though I do sit down to do my study, frequently, can't concentrate my mind to it!!! What's wrong with me? I couldn't help asking myself again and again. But, still, appearantly, no answer.(If I had foung it, I could have modified it soon) All that I have known is GS won't need a person like you!!! TAT